Welcome, Oliver, to HELL!
by Ten-Faced
Summary: Oliver, the new Vocaloid 3, is trying to introduce himself like Big Al told him to. Really, we know of the insanity the Vocaloid Mansion is filled with, don t we? Oliver, you have just arrived in Hell. Minor IrohaxOliver at the end. My attempt at humor


Wow, two pieces of Fiction in one day, and three in two…. Someone call the FBI, THE ALIENS ARE HERE!

Well, since I wrote OliverxSeeU in SeeUx?, and am planning an IrohaxSeeU, I thought I better release this one into the web, to neutralize them.

This is an IrohaxOliver, welcoming young Oliver into the Vocaloid Mansion.

I owe nothing.

* * *

><p><em>She owes Nothing, and yet, at the same time, Everything. Beware, in her World, there is no one who can win against her.<em>

* * *

><p>"And this is the Rec Room." Announced Big Al, sweeping his hands out at the huge room filled with Vocaloids.<p>

Oliver stared out of his one eye that wasn`t wrapped up in bandages. There were so many, and with a starling variety of colors, too.

"Go introduce yourself." Al slapped him on the back, hard enough to make him stumble.

He let out a groan. "Do I _have _to?" he whined like a child.

"Yes. Everyone else did it. Don`t break tradition, kid." He flashed a big, white smile at him, showing the perfect teeth in his mouth.

Oliver sighed. From the short time he had known Big Al, he had learned that he was a loud, slightly obnoxious man who was bossy. This just helped him prove the point further.

"Go!"

Very, _very_ bossy.

.

He decided that saying a nice, simple 'hello' to the pink-haired kittyloid would be the best. Oliver tapped the girl`s shoulder. "Hello, I`m Oliver, the new Vocaloid."

"…." She simply stared into space with black eyes.

"Err… what`s your name?"

"…." There was absolutely no indication that she had heard him.

"…Right, I`ll come back later." He turned and walked away, already discouraged.

.

"Wah!" Oliver leapt out the door and slammed it shut, just as a sword imbedded itself into the very spot he had been standing a second ago. He sighed in relief and slid to the ground.

"How`s it going, dude?" Big Al asked, seeing the poor boy breathless.

"Meiko tried to fling me away with her catapult, Kiyoteru accidently spilt coffee on my head, Miki pelted me with cherries, Miku whacked me with both her pigtails, Rin and Len nearly ran me over with the road roller and just now, Yuma tried to stab me."

"So all in all, a fairly normal day?"

Oliver stared at his senior in disbelief. "You`re kidding, right?"

"Nope. See, a hard day for us is when everything bad happens to you."

"Everything bad _did_ happen to me!"

"No, everything bad is when either Prima or Tei kills you painfully, or Master Ten-Faced tortures you in some way after all you suffered. What you just went through is normal."

Just then, a girl with long, pale blond hair and a pair of cat ears limped by, her leg bleeding.

"How`s it going, SeeU?"

"Ah, Mister Al!" she exclaimed, as she noticed the tall English Vocaloid. "I am fine. How do you do?"

"Pretty good. Say, have you met the new guy?" He pushed Oliver in front of her. "Meet Oliver, the new English Vocaloid 3. Oliver, SeeU. SeeU, Oliver. She`s a Korean Vocaloid 3 who also speaks Japanese."

"N-nice to meet you." Oliver stammered, drops of sweat dripping into his one visible eye. He was slightly relieved that she wasn`t Tei or Prima, but the bleeding leg still scared him.

"It is nice to meet you too, Oliver!" she exclaimed. "I hope we see each other again. See you!" and with that, she walked away, or tried to, dragging her leg behind her.

"Nice girl, SeeU."Commented Big Al. "She`s currently the most popular Vocaloid 3. Real pretty, too. You`ve got serious competition, Oliver."

Then they both heard a loud screech. "God damn it SeeU! I told you to stop bleeding everywhere!"

"Oh yeah..." trailed off Big Al, a dreamy look in his eyes. "Have you met Lily?"

"Do I want to?" From the profanities being screamed at the nice Korean that he could hear, she did _not _sound like a nice person at all.

"She`s one of the hottest girls in this place." He said in a singsong voice, trying to tempt him.

"And…?" Oliver was puzzled.

"Such a kid." He scoffed, and ruffled his hair.

"Hey!"

.

"Hi, I`m Oliver."

The green-haired girl with red goggles on her head looked at him, unimpressed. "Name`s Megpoid. Call me Gumi."

"Oh, um, ok, Ms. Gumi-"

"As for you," she interrupted, clearly not paying attention. "What`s your gimmick?"

"I beg your pardon?" And his confusion just kept rising….

"Your gimmick." She repeated, staring at him disgustedly as if he was retarded. "I am one of the most realistic-sounding Vocaloids, the VYs are genderless, Luka and SeeU are bilingual, Miku has her charms, the Kagamine`s are a dual, and Sonika is said to be able to speak all languages. _What _is your gimmick?

"Umm…" Oliver flailed around. What was special about him, which made him stand out?

"Thought though." Said Gumi, a haughty look on her face. Oliver wondered what he had done to this girl to make her insult him so much.

"Whoa there, little Gummi." Said a deep, female voice. Oliver turned to see the pink Vocaloid with the Hello Kitty theme. She slunk around to the sofa the surly girl sat on. "Did a certain someone forget to take her Back-to-Normal pills* today?"

"So?" snapped Gumi. What`s it to- oomph!" she choked. As she was talking, the pinkette had expertly tossed in a strange, orange and green pill into her mouth. After managing to swallow, she blinked. And then blinked again. And again. _And _then again.

"Oh hello!" she suddenly chirped, startling him. "Sorry for being a jerk earlier. I have a personality disorder. Ah, well, see you later!" and then she zoomed away.

Oliver stared after her, confused. What had happened?

"Name`s Nekomura Iroha." He turned to see her sticking her hand out at him. Oliver slowly shook it, a bit uncertain. "Sorry for ignoring you before, but I was tired."

Oliver started to stare at her. She looked so young, but had such a deep voice.

"Why were you introducing yourself?" he snapped out of it.

"Huh?"

"Most of us just said hi at dinnertime, when the Masters gathers everyone and announces your arrival."

"But Big Al said that I should go and introduce myself!" he cried, slowly realizing something, dread gathering in his stomach.

She shook her head slowly, a grin forming on her face as if she was amused. "He lied."

Oliver frowned. So the male Vocaloid had tricked him. "Hey, does that mean that I don`t have to introduce myself at dinner?" he asked, suddenly hopeful.

"No, you still have to, for the 'official' welcoming party." Oliver groaned.

"Hey, don`t worry." Iroha smiled. "I`ll be there for you, `Kay?"

He blushed. "Okay."

* * *

><p>*Pills designed for Vocaloids, as they can take on their song personalities every now and then. Sadly, it has no effect on me, and I still have ten faces.<p>

Hmmmm… Too fluffy… Ah well…

Review, to make sure SeeU`s bleeding leg is fixed.


End file.
